Life

The house is still and quiet this evening which allows me time to sift through the many thoughts and emotions that have been surfacing over the last few weeks. My partner is at work and my first senses were the way his shirt smelled when he left this afternoon. The smile I am greeted with on an almost daily basis and sweet kisses after a brief absence or when we are parting.

Music filters through his space, which he has so freely given me to write in this evening. Its comforting to know I sit where he sits, I see what he see’s, but more over to just feel his presence in this space.

I have no particular direction in which to write tonight, usually I have something that is weighing on me that needs to come to life…thats it Life.

Life is so fragile….so precious and happens so quickly.

“The currency of life is not money but time and love. Remember time is finite, but you are blessed with infinite love” ~Debasish Mridha

Over the last week or so I have been reminded of how precious our time here is. The children that lost their father in the middle of his life. The young woman and her brother who just lost their mother. I think of people who I hold close…the mother who lost her daughters, his Dad, a best friend who was able to stay a year longer than he was given, her Dad, his Mom, my Aunt and Uncle. We waste so much of our time holding grudges and hating. Forgetting that this is time and life that we are robbed of on our own accord. I know it may sound cold, but I have found that it is easier to walk away from those that have hurt you rather than stay connected and continuously suffer because of them. You will empty your own cup by continuously giving to others. Love and respect yourself enough to let go.

Life waits for no one…..

Figuring shit out

Peace for your Sunday evening

January 1, 2017

Let me start by saying that I don’t make resolutions…I never have.

The words have been eating at me for some time and more recent in the last 36 hours..so here I am for a dose of medicine that I don’t want to taste. (Big Baby haha )

I have learned a lot of things this past year and also confirmed a few things I know to be true. First and foremost, “LISTEN TO YOUR INTUITION”.

I havent had a great track record with male figures in my life, from step fathers to my soon to be ex husband and partners. I dont care what anyone has to say…in my life there has only been one man who hasn’t cheated on me. One. They say lessons repeat until you learn. So what the fuck am I supposed to learn? That 2016 taught me I don’t have to be so nice and that some people just need to be cut the fuck off. That this time I am giving a second chance when I typically will walk away? I know that I need to love my self again, that I need to be as good to me as I am to people in my life. Selfish? I doubt it. I am not conceited or full of myself but I am a good Mom, daughter, sister, friend, girlfriend….I am a good human being even when life deposits shitty people in my path. I smile and keep pushin. I treat people as I would like to be treated and therefore end up with hurt feelings and more scars. I will not settle for anyone and expect no one to settle for me. I love fucking hard…yeah, I have baggage, if you say you don’t, you lie. So if you feel its off, it is….no rose colored glasses anymore of a good, loving, perfect partner. Reality is a bitch sometimes.

So here we are 2017…….I look back on the last year of my life and that of my friends and one thing that will not let up is “2016, You hit like a bitch!!!”. 2016 proved that there is no perfect person for you, we are all fucked up. It’s about finding the ability to love beyond faults, second chances come once.  I have been through so much bullshit and here I am. So fuck resolutions and fuck being that nice woman who takes shit lying down.

For us…

Love ourselves,travel more, love each other, be kind, be patient, take risks, love ourselves, kiss deeply, let people that you love know you love them, appreciate all things, more life, less bullshit, walk away when we can’t anymore, love ourselves, we are the only ones we really have,  its okay to ask for help, don’t carry the weight of the world on your own, there are people who care….buy the stuff…we live one time. Never, ever, judge a book by its cover. Love ourselves, kiss them…and more than once. Hug with intention. Make more eye contact and conversation. Be a good human. Above all love yourself and make you happy. Its contagious. Oh and one more thing, dont forget to……

LOVE YOURSELF

HAPPY 2017

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